Monthly Archives: January 2011

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my letter to you

dear sweet,
i’m getting all of these beautiful comments and e-mails… and in the mix, i’m hearing over and over again ‘i wish i could be this brave…’ ‘i hope that someday i can feel this comfortable’

listen… this is your chance. this is your permission to forget ‘someday’. someday will never come… because today. is the day. today is your someday.
today is the day to stop wishing, and start doing.

today is the day that you give yourself permission to live with more love, and less hate.
for yourself. your sisters. your friends. for our daughters… for them to grow up with a little bit more confidence than you grew up with. in hopes that their battles are less with self..
today, you can begin. what have you got to lose? why wait? why live another day without more love in your life? it’s not too late.
it’s not as hard or scary as you think…
you are strong.
you are capable.
you are worthy. and beautiful. and loved.
you deserve this…
you are amazing. and unique.
and your mama gave birth to the most beautiful baby.

it’s a daily practice, sure…
over time it becomes a habit- just as your habit of looking in the mirror, grabbing, pinching, sucking in has become.

we all have those things that we want to work on. some extra weight to shift, those pants in the closet that we are desperate to squeeze back into one day.
but you are not your weight.
you are more than that. you deserve better than that.

image by Karen Walrond of chookooloonks

you deserve kindness. if we want our children to love themselves and others… if we want the world to be a more compassionate place- it begins at home. it begins with self.
the only time you’re wasting is by not starting now.
this chain reaction starts… your happiness and acceptance is contagious. people want to be around you… you inspire others.

i’m with you. you are not alone.

here’s an easy way to start: write down the things you dislike, the things you hate. and for every one of those- you must write at least one thing that you love about yourself.
for every negative thought you have for yourself, or for someone else- counter it with at least one positive thing.
read this real quick…

namaste.
i honour the light inside you- that is also inside me… that is inside us all.

By edarcy | Posted in journey, {daily} | Comments (9)

paper heart

i have a tiny stack of magazines. anthropologie and some other..fantastically eye candy.. clothing magazine. anyway. i don’t really buy magazines like i used to- but have always looooved them for cutting up. these ones were going to be thrown out a few weeks ago. but i kept them. SEE? my hoarding problems are totally winning. i knew that they’d come into good use for SOMETHING.

la la la

so i began cutting out hearts.

i keep seeing all of these garlands and banners- and it makes me desperate for a sewing machine… and then i found a way to cheat.

perfect for the kiddies on a rainy afternoon.
what you need: magazines/paper (newspaper would be beautiful. could even watercolour it…)
string. i used embroidery floss. hell.. floss floss would work! just not candy floss. that’s for munching.
tape.
voilà!

bird poop on the outside of the window is optional, but i feel adds a rustic aesthetic to it.

By edarcy | Posted in domesticity, inspiration for the uninspired | Comments (7)

consider this…

the negative, ugly words that you might choose to use for yourself- is not something that you would EVER use to someone that you love and care about.
so with that, why would you say it …about yourself?

it’s not about accepting your post-baby body (or whatever flaws you dislike)…it’s more about treating yourself with as much love and compassion. tenderness and understanding- for yourself… as you would the people you love.

you matter too…
you are just as important.
you are just as beautiful.
you are loved.

and so now it’s time to take the leap. and begin loving yourself more openly. to begin treating yourself with the same kindness and respect you’d treat your best friend.

it’s your turn. and i promise you’re not alone…
and i promise- it makes life so much more amazing. it opens you up to receive more love and light and positive things.
you are a unique gift to the world.
cherish that.

By edarcy | Posted in journey | Comments (7)

p.s.

i love you.

and this space… the way we’ve been brought together. this community in the comments. the positivity and light.

what a way to start off the year!

you’re incredible… and i bow to you.

By edarcy | Posted in {daily} | Comments (1)

raw

i’m feeling
cracked wide open
in awe.
inspired.
vulnerable.
powerful.
mistaken.
amazed.
in love…
scared.

my post ‘shape of a mother‘ was featured on an article on the Glamour website today (!!!) saying that feels insane in itself.  at first i was giddy, giggly, and trying to play it cool.
then my friends comments started rolling in, and comments from strangers… and i am humbled. brought to my knees. falling in love with all of these women. my belly swims with butterflies- feeling like i’m not big enough to hold all of their out-pourings.. but i am. we’re doing this together. we’re better together.

more and more people were reposting. and suddenly i’m feeling vulnerable. eesh. comments i can’t control. wanting to help people to realise what these images mean to me.. what they are about…

wanting people to realise that i’m not this confident thing. that it’s a journey of love and tenderness for myself. and a lesson we all need to take on. it’s been a long road- but it feels amazing to be on it.

have you noticed how much more negativity weighs? how much more draining it is to be around…

By edarcy | Posted in journey, motherhood, {daily} | Comments (7)

this moment

i step outside the room and peer in, as if i’m looking in on someone else’s life…
like in dream lands.
everything goes in slow motion for a moment, the sound is dulled and sweet. there is some chaos of mess…

and my heart pitter patters breathing it all in… i’m so in love.

By edarcy | Posted in journey, motherhood | Comments (2)

no.7 on the list

i finally got business cards printed.
i’m not super crazy about how they turned out… but whatever. it’s the first time i’ve ever had any. though, looking at that picture- i think i want to take a picture of my paint tin and write my name/business info on that- and print THAT as an artists card. ooooh! maybe next time.  maybe as postcard size!
which means that now i really really need to get my act together and photograph originals, and list some prints i have on the shelf, collecting dust.
which means, i need to order my shipping supplies and get organized so i feel more.. ready. to open the doors to my etsy again.

either way, i’ve managed to cross at least one more thing off of my ‘23 things to do before 24‘ list. la la laa

By edarcy | Posted in goals | Comments (3)

time warp. wasted.

internal conflict:

check mail. reply. think about what i want to say, click on something else. brain lapse. forget to reply.
go make cup of tea. while it’s brewing- try to fold some clothes.
forget about brewing tea as it sits there cold. shit..
drink luke warm tea while massive sea of pink clothes multiplies before my eyes.
play, rock, sing, talk with baby. change nappy. nurse. put her to sleep in ergo.
now. things. do things. things things oh THINGS!
like…
burn a disc or two for a friend, sister-in-law(s), mom too probably.
write thank-you note to midwife.
oh do that new project i thought about starting.
wait! wait. finish a project first…
okay…
let me check my e-mail first.
ooh! pinterest!
hmmm wonder if anything is happening on facebook.
oh wait, what was i doing? right. THINGS!
put disc in tray… open program. hmmm not working. remind myself to ask steven and do this later.
feel guilty for the things i haven’t done for people that i said i would… push that to the back of my mind.
search web for inspiration for images
WAIT WAIT… finish a project first.
open folder of incomplete pieces to work on… *yaaaawwwn* i’m bored with them.
start looking through old pictures…
oh baby’s awake! la la laaa. kiss and cuddle and sing with her.
skype with mama
shit… i haven’t done anything but write a post about doing nothing.
and how i can’t seem to ever. ever. ever. finish a project.
dust bunnies gather in the corners. hell.. they’re dancing all over the living room- forget the corners.

sit here for 5 minutes thinking about a title. feel ridiculous/self conscious about title choice. ishouldjustdeletethis..
blahblahblah oh! let’s go through my blogroll and read what other people are talking about.
hmph! sunday. no one’s updated.

alas. i’ve gotten nothing done.
what about you?

By edarcy | Posted in {daily} | Comments (4)

living in the glow of love

i’m in awe of you.
this out pouring of love over the pictures steven took of me yesterday, in my knickers that are too big for me.
i posted yesterday’s post without much thought. i was thinking of writing something, but really had no idea what needed to be said. so i left it.

it was way more than body image. in fact, it had nothing to do with it.

it has everything to do with this beautiful life…. oh. it’s so sweet, this life.

i very distinctly remember reaching 20 weeks pregnant. it felt magical… my body was growing and stretching, my baby was mysterious, and i was living in a glow of love.
and now my babe is 20 weeks old. incredible. beyond what i ever could have imagined…

i sent those pictures to a friend first- she asked ‘how do these pictures make you feel?’

proud.

oh so proud. i love that body that’s cradling that sweet babe. i love that body so much- because i remember a similar picture i took of myself- but i could only see it through a blur of tears. hatred, and ugly words.
oh how it’s changed.

i’m a mama…
my body is so imperfect and soft and sexy in a different way. in a real way… in a way that my husband grabs me and wants me. in a powerful way that- i carried life, i gave birth, and i nourish this babe.  in a way that- i know i look more like you and less like airbrushed images. genuine and honest and imperfectly perfect.

being vulnerable can be powerful.  loving yourself can be even more.
you don’t have to get naked and take pictures of yourself.  you don’t have to be brave.
just start with compassion. for. yourself.
open your eyes wide and see the bigger picture. see beyond what stands in the mirror.

-xo.

By edarcy | Posted in motherhood, {daily} | Comments (57)

the shape of a mother

you are beautiful, do you know that?
and your imperfections make you even more perfect.

-xo.

(eta- oh loves… you’ve inspired me so. make sure you read the follow up here)

By edarcy | Posted in motherhood, {daily} | Comments (115)