it’s time.
you can make all the resolutions to lose weight, eat healthy, give up bad habits etc. etc..
but it’s really truly time to honour yourself fully while you take on everything else.
i want you to start treating yourself like your very best friend. i want you to start treating yourself like someone that you love unconditionally.
i want you to start clearing away negative thoughts and energy in all areas of your life, most especially that directed to yourself.
i can promise you that it isn’t something you will regret,
that you will thank yourself for years and years to come…
how do we begin something like that?
you have all of the medicine you need within you.
you are a beautiful force.
there is no one in this world like you, and that’s the truth..
step into your future self – the self that you want to be, the happy, content, LIVING fully self
and i want you to look from that perspective at the you today… and really *see*
what does this woman need? what is stopping her from living this life? what can i give to her?
i used to stand at the mirror and watch as the person in front of me would balloon into a monster, even on a ‘good day’. she was hideous, she seemed unworthy of love. i’d move closer to pick apart the flaws in my skin. i’d turn this way and that to see every angle.. disgusted and defeated- i’d go on with my day.
what kind of a life is that?
one day, while i was in the middle of this hate cycle- i suddenly had the foresight to see myself, from my own perspective, from an outside perspective, from my future self.. i saw this girl that was hurting, this girl that was sad, this girl that was so fucking hard on herself for no particular reason. i realised that she needed me to be her friend, the one thing she needed- was for me to not hate her so much, for me to not pick her apart so much, for me to love her.. to be kind to her, to be gentle with her.. for me to forgive her, accept her.
i realised that i would never ever talk to anyone else the same way i did myself. a stranger, a friend, someone i loved- i saved the worst words for myself, but why?
and so began the relationship with self..
i took a deep breath, and i accepted her. my brow softened, and i befriended her… i saw her wounds and ache, and i held her and loved her through them.
i began replacing all negative energy around me with positive energy.
on days where i might sink into old habits, i’d quickly remove myself from the situation and practice love and forgiveness. i allowed myself to feel whatever it was that i needed to feel, i didn’t judge it. i was my own best friend.
soon, i began LIVING.
waking up in this body felt good. walking around in this body felt divine. my whole being was smiling, i felt lighter, lifted…
i realised that there was the before and after- because now when i look at pictures of me in the past, i see all of that hurt, all of that ache, all of that sadness and hatred… it makes me so sad for her, doesn’t she realise what she’s missing out on? doesn’t she see how beautiful she really is?
and then.. it dawns on me, i am now living that future self- the woman who stepped in, stepped up, and started loving. ..started living.
—
you have the medicine within you. you can be your own guide, your own inspiration.
you are the only one who knows exactly what you need,
you are the only person to give exactly that to yourself.
what are you waiting for?
begin now.
take a deep breath, see who is sitting here today- and ask what it is that you can offer her, what you can do to give her what she needs. what you can do to fully love her.
and then, i want you to start clearing away the negative energy you store within. while driving in traffic, let go of impatience, let go of frustration. while being inconvenienced, stop. relax. breathe. and let it go, what really is the rush? look into the eyes of those that serve you, at restaurants, at the store – and thank them. when someone pays you a compliment, don’t brush it off – embrace it and say ‘thank you’
when thinking of those that have hurt you- light a candle and send them light, surround them, wrap them up in beautiful healing light, and then let them go, they have their own hurts- and you have no room left in your beautiful body for negative energy.
begin.
with kindness, love and compassion for self.
i believe in the beauty that is you.
your friends and loved ones are waiting for you to see it too.
validate yourself.
stop wasting your life not loving who you are…
start living.
thank goodness i found that zombie survival guide, a gift from my brother- of course 
thankful for living in a place that i can have this moment.these moments. that i can live comfortably doing exactly what i want to be doing, exactly what i should be doing… savouring every single bit of this with her. knowing how very lucky we are.
playing with her toes while nursing